Marriage proposal considerations for women

Proposing to your boyfriend

First of all, are you really sure you want to do it this way? Do you want to take the initiative and ask him, rather than get him to ask you?

Are you also sure that this is the man for you? Is he sure about you? Why hasn’t he already asked you to marry him? How will he feel if you ‘steal his thunder’? Is he likely to accept your proposal?

There is a lot to think about but, if you have decided that this is the way forward that will suit you both, then go, girl!

Just as when a man is planning to propose to a woman, the focus should be on the askee. Think what sort of man he is and what sort of proposal will fill him with joy. Should it be loud and public or quiet and private? There are as many ways to propose as there are people who are moved to pop the question. Find a way that suits his personality and style and, whatever you choose to do, make sure your sincerity shines through.

How to get your boyfriend to propose to you, the way you want him to

Once you are at the stage when you both know you’re right for each other and that marriage is the natural next step, you can start dropping hints about how and where you would like him to ask you and what sort of ring you would like. You can also let him know what you don’t want.

Avoid being overprescriptive or trying to control him. If he feels you’re pushing him, he may back off but, as long as you keep your hints light and oblique, your man will find the information you’re providing very useful.

If it takes him longer to get round to it than you would like, be patient. He may be afraid you’ll say no, so make it clear that you love him, respect him and will stick by him no matter what. If, after a while, that hasn’t worked, you could try telling him you’re thinking of taking a job abroad, or moving to another part of the UK. Don’t make this sound like an ultimatum because that could backfire on you; this is meant just to prompt him to reflect on how the future is going to pan out for you both.